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31 Dec 2017

My ideal guy changed after we had sex for the first time over Christmas — did I ruin everything with one evening?

AFTER I’d had sex with the guy I was dating, he suddenly cooled it with me. It was like he’d flicked off a switch.
Photos used to illustrate act

He lives locally, is 38 and single. I am 32 and divorced.

He messaged me every day for a month and gave me the impression he was keen to have a future with me.

He seemed caring too, asking about me and my daughter.

Then he came over to my house one night before Christmas and we had sex while my daughter was out visiting her dad.

He immediately changed and that amazing person disappeared. He said our relationship was rushed.

Did one evening of sex spoil everything for me?

DEIDRE SAYS: Maybe he is a user, plain and simple, or perhaps he is afraid of commitment because he has been hurt in the past, for instance, or if he saw his parents experience a painful break-up.

If you want to give him the benefit of the doubt, tell him it seems a shame to let a promising relationship go, but he would need to show greater self-awareness if you are not to end up getting hurt again.

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